June 4, 2009 Sugirdha 1Comment

I belong to a traditional and religious background. I grew up listening to stories of ramayana and mahabharata from grand parents. Like every other child in our neighbourhood, I would get new clothes only on birthdays, festivals and other religious functions. We went to temple and worshipped, and most of the times, ‘worship’ meant holding your palms together and chanting some mantras. I was not taught to ‘think’ about it all. Those were peaceful days when my heart was filled with belief in something I did not even know what. It was all until I decided that I should think about God, that I have the rights to choose my own path and do only things that my belief will allow me to do.
That was when my religious life became a mess. I was torn between faith and atheism. I didn’t understand faith anymore. I did not believe in idol worship. I did not believe in worshipping any form. But I was not an atheist either. It’s just that I was searching for an answer. I tried to learn spiritualism but nothing held my interests. At times I even questioned myself. I didn’t know if I was looking for God or the absence of God. I was actually searching for logic. A logic that seemed like it would never be found.
When my baby was born, I was in an even more urge to find the answer. I cannot grow him without a religion. Religion helped me through my childhood and teenage years even though I had no faith. I wanted Pappu to follow a religion as well, atleast until he understands the difference between faith and religion. Just when I thought my quest was coming to an end without an answer, something happened in my life and things started to fall in place. After days of reading and listening to leaders, I started to realise something.
It started with reading the book, The Secret. While reading the chapters of the book, I was able to relate with many things, good and bad, that happened to me in the past. The book stood as an answer to why things happened in the first place. I started realising how I had attracted many of those things toward me. It is not magic. I was actually finding the logic.
It worked in the past. I realised that I could make it work in the future too. I chose to believe. And the next few weeks raised my belief level. I saw things happening differently when I believed without a tint of doubt. Slowly after that I changed. My whole perspective of faith changed. Understanding the law of attraction helped me redefine myself. I was able to complete the puzzle which had been jumbled for so many years.
In the past, whenever my mother talked with me about faith, I would tell her “Show me God. Ask your God to show me a miracle. And then I’ll believe”. Now I know, Miracles do happen, if you believe!

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